Feb
we recently broke up after trying to work things out for 9 months.3 weeks later, he decided to give it another try and about the same time I found out I was pregnant. He says we need to work things out between us before we have the ability to raise a family.I don't want to have an abortion neither do I want to be a single mom.What do I do?
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Raise your child the ideal you can. He'll come around but don't make any decisions you will regret just because your relationship isn’t working right now. My husband. Boyfriend at the time we were going through a lot as well. Everything ends up working out. Here we are this day with one and one on the way. Things have a way of working themselves out. You just focus on taking care of you and your baby. No stress love. Take care.
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That's a tough question, girl. You do have options though, you don't have to be a single mother. I'm not a fan of abortion personally, but I do support your right to have one. If you choose that route you’ve about 3 weeks to do it. Another option is adoption. It's not a very easy thing to do, but is a very good option for yourself(since you're not ready to be a single mom), for him(because he doesn't have to be a father yet), for the baby(it gets to live and will have a good life) and for the adoptive parents(they get a child that they have the ability to give all their love to). Birth mothers have a lot more rights than what they used to so if you wanted you could even have and open adoption so that you're still a part of the baby's life and you could both pick the adoptive parents.
Basically, it's something that you two need to talk about and hopefully come to an understanding about. The baby is technically half his, but it is you're body that it's in, if you don't want an abortion that’s you're choice.
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You need to talk to him about this very seriously.
His view needs to be taken into consideration, but so does yours. I think you should talk about why he doesn't want it, and see if there's any issues there that can be resolved.
You also need to take into consideration if you can look after the baby and if you’ve enough finances. Otherwise, you could maybe speak about other options like adoption as well?
It's a tricky situation, but you really need to talk it through with him. I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you.
Best of luck to all of you! =]
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i really think you should keep the baby I comprehend that theres a lot of pressure and many things on your mind no matter how old you are but deciding to have an abortion or whatever just isnt the answer things can happen and work out good if you just believe! Try talking to him and dont let him get to you i know what guys tell you can get to you and persuade you to do things you just dont want to do just think it threw anyone is capable to raise a baby and theres always adoption just try thinking it over
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Don't have an abortion, especially if you don't want to. Don't let him state or do anything that would make you do that. It only causes a lifetime of pain and regret. I know there are people out there who would love to abopt your baby, take care of it as their own and love it in a stable environment. I'm one of them. You could also look into open adoption. In an open adoption the family sends you cards, letters, and pictures to let you know how your baby is doing. You never have to wonder what happened, or where your baby ended up. Koeshey@yahoo.com is my e-mail, if you need anything, even just to speak, send me a message.
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first you need to tell him that he cant put you in that position! if he wasn't ready to raise a baby he should have never took that action. im pro choice, but it doesn't matter what he wants or what he thinks. sweetie you will be the one carrying it so it is ultimately your decision. if yu don't want to have it aborted, think about adoption. a lot of women cant have kids and desperately want one. you could be someones guardian angel, you can give them the gift they cant give themselves. my ideal friend just adopted and she’s so thankful for that young lady to have let her adopt it.
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its a difficult situation to be in. I think the most important thing is to put your boyfriend second at the moment. It may sound harsh, but its important you put yourself first when making this decision.
First if you dont want to abort, don’t let anyone speak you into it, its not a one off decision. It will be with you emotionally for the rest of your life.
Secondly if you do go ahead with the pregnancy, adoption is an option, again, a very hard choice. It takes a very special person to be able to give up a child that they have given birth too. A women bonds with the baby during the pregnancy and so you will love the baby before you see him/her.
Thirdly, being a single mom would be hard, and i take my hat off to any out there, as I know it can be hard with both parents. It wouldnt be the end of the world and you would cope. Your boyfriend may have came round at that point!
No one can make this desision for you, you need to think long and hard about it, whatever your decision it will be ideal for you1
Good luck xxx
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Its a really really important question… and one that you won't find an answer to on the web… however, you need to come to a decision swiftly. Speak to your bf about why he doesn't want the baby. Talk to someone you trust eg a parent about what you feel on the matter. Also you should talk to a professional. There are counsellors dedicated to helping women in your situation who are undecided on abortion/ single motherhood. Either choice is difficult so the more advice and help you can get the superior.
Good luck!!
xx
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my baby's daddy told me the same thing, I told him to go suck one!! There’s NO WAY in hell I would EVER let a man come in between me and my daughter!! Chances are since yall have been having problems you aint gonna last anyways, and he just don't want to get stuck with child support! I'm sure once you hold that baby in your arms you'll fall absolutely in love with him/her! But murder or abortion which ever term you prefer is NEVER the answer, if you still insist on picking him over your child, the least you can do for the baby is give it up for adoption.
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What about open adoption where you can still have contact with your child. You're obviously not in a situation where you can deal with the responsibility of being a full time mom.
There are lots of options.. I'd also advocate using contraception during sexual intercourse with your Boyfriend to prevent the possibility of this situation re-occuring,
Good Luck
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keep the baby there are plenty men out in this world that will rais ebaby like he/she was his own. it not the baby fault it deserves to have a life to. i think go with the baby he’ll either come around or he wont but the baby will always be there. so if i was u i would keep him/her. u dont know if it u can have anymore kids and besides when u get pregnant it gods gift and happened for a reason. best luck u can do what u want but that what i would do if i was in ur shoes.
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You could have avoided this if you had 1.) discussed this at length with him to figure things out and 2.) waited to get married before having sex.
That definitely would have not just solved this problem you're having, but it would have also prevented it from happening in the first place.
As for what to do now, since you're not married, what I'd suggest is for you two to break up. There are guys out there who will date a single mom.
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I'm very sorry. These situations are never simple. But I would encourage you not to abort your baby simply because the father isn't on board. It's not simple, but there are thousands of women who can’t have kids who would be more than delighted to adopt your baby. It's not the babies fault that things aren't going so great. Don't make him pay the price!
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why is it when a guy walks out a girl always turns to an abortion as the ideal option? how is killing your baby the ideal option? pfft.
oh, and if you were trying to work things out for 9 month why are you 5 weeks pregnant? why would you get pregnant to someone you know you dont have a secure future with? absolutely unfair on the child.
adopt the child instead of killing it.
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This is a serious decision, one that once made can not be changed. I would strongly advise that you speak with someone about your dilemma, preferably a neutral third party. Perhaps a counselor at a program like Planned Parenthood or your family doctor. I will say that in the end you must do what feels right in your heart. Never make a decision like this based on what someone else wants. You'll live to regret it. Good luck!
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If you do not want to consider abortion, and you feel that the environment (fatherless, home, occupation) is not suitable, then adoption would be the best way to go.
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You guy need a serious family conversation and have to really work things out.
It is your baby and also his.
Don't do anything that you know that you’ll regret for the rest of your life.
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If I wasn't single I would love to adopt a baby.
I am sure there are women out there who would love to adopt your baby.
You can interview them and even have her pay the medical bills.
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People are waiting in line to adopt babies.
There are several women who cannt physically have a baby or is single.
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Like everyone else is saying,there's always adoption.
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Adoption.
Ideal of luck.
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First you dump him and then you begin placing some worth on yourself. You cant be that desperate for such a heartless man , can you
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You could put the baby up for adoption.
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Do what’s ideal for you and the baby. A baby is a true blessing.
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Dont have an abortion! Put the baby up for adoption. Thats the only way..
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Adoption is always a good choice.
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hmmmmm if you dont wnat to then dont keep the baby..
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What's so bad about adoption?
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You’ve to do what you think is best for you.